Before diving into dating your first African woman, it’s important to get a few things straight, understand what your experience might be like, and some obvious as well as not so obvious “Do’s and Dont’s”.
First, it’s important that you go into this relationship with an open-mind, no matter where your African woman is from in the world, including Kenya.
Every type of African woman is bound to be different, and in consideration of how huge Africa is and all the various countries, there is no one way to discuss or prepare yourself for dating just one type of African woman.
And without generalizing, let’s take this opportunity to review 10 critical steps to better understanding your Kenyan woman, her culture, worldviews, why she is interested in you, and what to expect.
1. First, it’s important that you separate yourself from the all great and powerful popularization of African women, especially African American women, that depicts them as hip-hop, ‘booty shaking’, tattooed women that wear ‘ratchet’ clothing, have a little self-respect, or talk loud and curse in public.
If you had any notion of any of these stereotypes and believe them, chances are you’re going to not only have a rude awakening, but also a tough time getting along with, understanding, and pleasing an Africa woman.
That’s why these tips are so important, to help you move past stereotypes and appreciate where African women originate from, why their culture within cultures as so unique, and how even you have your own share of stereotypes, but also ‘sex appeal’ as a foreigner.
2. Kenyan women are raised with a lot of self-respect, class, and will expect you to equally be a gentleman, know how to be chivalrous, and be someone who has independence, adheres to responsibilities, and aspires to be something great in life and really make a difference.
Because Kenyan women happen to be quite humble and yet ambitious, they likewise appreciate a man with big dreams that are realistically within his reach, and ones that consists of giving back or being a part of something greater than himself.
3. Chances are, may it be online or in person, that you’re going to find Kenyan women are just as interested and drawn to you as someone who is “exotic” and expected to be different as much as you hold similar expectations for them. African women typically love the idea of getting to know, and possibly even something more with a foreigner.
But remember, it’s not all about race, and chances are you’ve already learned that race is by no means the solution – as you’ve likely dated enough women of your race, ethnicity, and various backgrounds that you’ve come to realize this is by far now the best possible solution for finding a soul mate.
4. If you’ve been dating or searching for Kenyan women online, and have yet to visit the actual country then you’re still on the right path. Because Kenyan women are so unique, and their country so large you’re going to realize that these strong, sexy, and often single African women will have various cultural influences, heritage, lifestyles, backgrounds, languages, and even dialects.
So, take your time, and for each question you ask be considerate, patient, and let your Kenyan woman know something about you. This “give and take” type of relationship and communication is sure to impress, satisfy, and keep your Kenyan woman curious to learn more about you – which leads to our next piece of advice.
5. Whether you’re just meeting and talking to your Kenyan woman online, or in person, make it a point to reserve some things about yourself – leaving room for her imagination. You don’t want to spill your guts on the first few dates or times you talk together, and you want to keep her guessing. Kenyan women love this in a man, appreciate an adventure, and you’re sure to peak her interest by doing so.
6. African women desire and expect to be treated like a Queen, and Kenyan women are no exception. They are used to being treated with care, passion, love, patience, and loyalty so regardless of if you’re a foreigner or not, Caucasian, Asian, it doesn’t matter, they’ll still expect the same from you.
This means truly learning about your Kenyan woman or date, showing a genuine interest in her life, family, what she believes in, aspires to be, and why. Try to learn the ins and outs about what she enjoys, what she doesn’t enjoy, what she’s looking for in a relationship, and share your past (where appropriate) with her as well.
Also, try to make new experiences together to really strengthen your bond over time. Kenyan women are very close to their boyfriend or (future) husband, loyal, and committed to dedicating themselves to you, so don’t make the mistake of not returning this respect, love, and loyalty.
7. For some men this might be obvious, others curious, and few that may not have taken the warning seriously when their friends told them the stories, but, do NOT touch your Kenyan woman’s hair without her permission, or invitation to do so.
Don’t assume that it’s alright, because quite honestly it likely isn’t. They work very hard to care for their hair, and chances are it requires hours, days, if not more of maintenance, natural chemicals, and time at the salon than you could ever imagine.
At the same time, it’s not a toy, so try not to give the impression of a fetish or anything with regards to her hair. While it’s fine to be curious, and more than likely will come off as “cute”, if you know when to touch her, but also know when to stop then you should be okay.
8. This is a big rule of thumb for dating women in general, but especially strong African women. Have confidence, know what you want, protect, love her, and never be embarrassed or uncertain about your relationship with your Kenyan woman.
Understand and prepare yourself to already accept that not everyone will approve of your interracial relationship or marriage, and that this is just a part of life and society – from Africa to the United States, and beyond.
This is a reality that you’re bound to have to accept, or, waste endless amounts of time energy, or even get yourself in trouble fighting people that challenge or might insult you throughout the course of your life and relationship.
9. While it’s true that African women are especially passionate in bed, Kenyan women likewise are also quite romantic. However, you should never start, or even stay in a relationship with a “fixation” on sex – just like you shouldn’t fetishize about being with a Black woman.
It’s not welcomed, strange, and may even insult your lover. So be original, and give your Kenyan woman an honest, well thought out, respectful, and considerate explanation for your interest in her. Don’t be a stereotypical foreigner, or the curious white guy that asks weird questions about stereotypes, jokes, or assumes without really getting to know her first.
10. Last but not least, act normal, and be yourself. We know that you see this advice everywhere, but it’s true and especially relevant when dating or considering marrying a Kenyan woman.
By no means are either of you representative of an entire race or country, so take it easy, be natural, and just have fun. No skin color can realistically dictate the likelihood of your success in a relationship, only honesty, hard work, and love can do that.